Monthly Archives: January 2021

Be the Light

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My heart is warm and hopeful after witnessing so much class and inspiration today at America’s capitol as we successfully (albeit under the heaviest military presence we’ve ever seen in this country) completed the peaceful transition of power. The darkness, craziness, disillusionment and violence of two weeks ago today made for a very scary, heavy feeling in my heart, in many of our hearts, ever since.

Today we heard the problems our nation faces tackled head on, the incredibly hard work ahead of us addressed. But it was dealt with warmly, with hope, optimism and messages of unity. It was such a refreshing change from all the hate and vulgar speech we’ve heard spewed from our leadership these past four years. These years have been a stark reminder to me how much words matter. Words can truly darken a soul, tamp out hope and divide brothers and sisters. Today showed how just as truly words can do the opposite. They can lighten a soul, create hope and unify people.

We all need to watch our words. We need to hear the words of others and choose ours carefully. They matter.

And not just words. We have much work ahead of us. We have to put the work behind the words to actually heal.

The highlight for me today was the poem written and read by 22-year-old Amanda Gorman. To me, this bright, intelligent, eloquent, inspirational and kind-hearted young woman epitomizes the hope we now have for this country.

As she said, “Somehow we’ve witnessed and weathered a nation that isn’t broken, but is simply unfinished.” We may have felt broken often over the past few years. I know I have. Some of our brothers and sisters have felt broken since the inception of this country. They have never been fully respected and included. They have been stolen from, oppressed. But we are not completely broken. We are just not finished. It is time to get to work.

As Gorman finished, “The new dawn blooms as we free it, for there is always light if only we are brave enough to see it, if only we are brave enough to be it.”** To BE IT. It is time to be the light, to shine our light to benefit others and lift each other up. I am feeling brave today. I am ready to be the light. Let’s do this, America!

**Here is a link to her poem if for some reason you haven’t read it yet. 🙂

https://www.poetry.com/poem/60572/the-hill-we-climb

Look Within

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Like many of us, I was extremely rattled by the events of Wednesday, January 6th in America. I felt a weird numbness for awhile and it’s taken time to sort out my feelings. My initial reaction was Enough Is Enough. Get those people out of our country. People that can’t accept the results of a legal and fair election two months after it has been examined, recounted, verified, and certified by officials they voted for, that they have supported for years, judges appointed by the man they idolize, officials who also voted for this man and donated to his campaign–people that would take their frustration with this loss and turn it into violence and rampage against (again) people they have voted into office, representatives they have supported and believed in for years, representatives who are as loyal to their president as they are, against the men and women in uniform they purport to unfailingly support, the people they find incapable of making any transgressions worth attempting to correct–well, there’s nothing more this country can offer you. Get out. Just get out. The majority of people in this country will never agree to our country becoming the place you envision. It’s time to move on and move out.

I saw a video recently describing all the policies these people desire in their country–healthcare as a privilege instead of a right, the right to carry weapons freely, abortion a crime, low taxes, etc. Through a process of elimination it found Iraq as the one country who offered everything they want. So, there. Go. Iraq will welcome you. America does not.

My next feeling was that of embarrassment. How can I feel so deeply connected to, and patriotic towards a place like this? A place where this happens? A place where as events are still unfolding before our eyes, people change the narrative to say it was far left radicals storming the Capitol? A place where people believe those altered stories rather than what they can see with their own eyes? A place that equates this insurrection to people protesting against hundreds of years of oppression, as if the two are comparable? A place where, when a business refuses service to someone they don’t like, it’s their right to do so, but when they refuse service to a man they idolize, it goes against our Constitution? It’s utterly heartbreaking. Completely embarrassing. No words.

After a couple days of those feelings, as is my pattern, I turned to self-examination, human examination. Why? How? What do we need to do from here (because, let’s be honest, those people aren’t going anywhere, and even if they did, a new form of evil would replace them)?

I do a lot of reading about why we hate, where anger comes from. It seems to come down to fear. We direct our anger towards what we fear. I read an interesting piece about how poverty is stigmatized in America. We are taught that if we work hard and do our best, we will prosper finanically. If we struggle financially, it is due to laziness, poor choices. For most of us struggling financially, it is not due to laziness or poor choices, but we fear the stigma, so we look to blame others. “Others” we can blame are numerous–those in power, immigrants, etc.

I’ve reflected here previously that the ideal of financial wellbeing seems to top overall wellbeing for Americans. I don’t know why. But the more I look into it, the more it seems to be true–that we can put other morals and ethics aside to ensure our own individual (not the community, not the whole) financial wellbeing. We can justify voting for someone based on his business acumen because we believe that is what will save our family from being taken advantage of by lazy people on welfare, etc. We can ignore his other words and actions, because he is a good businessman–that is the ideal in America, to succeed in business.

I find it incredibly sad that we feel this way. My personal beliefs say that if healthcare was a right for all, if higher education was affordable–that would lead to people feeling less financially anxious, and might give us room to focus more on overall wellbeing.

As for the other side of that anger–what gets the blood boiling of people I can identify more with, the people who were outraged over what happened at the Capitol, but who understand the importance of the Black Lives Matter movement even when we don’t agree with the looting? The answers I find are still based in fear. Fear of what? Fear that this is actually America, not what we envision America to be? Fear that this is not only how we are perceived, but who we actually are? Fear that that darkness lies within ourselves? It does. We all have it. We have to work against it.

That leads me back to self-examination. For the past few days, I have been listening to a program called Set Your Vision for 2021 through the Chopra center. It’s led by Deepak Chopra’s chief meditation officer, Roger Gabriel. He says that the key to knowing ourselves is to look inward. It’s when we focus on the world around us, everything external, that we get caught up in fears, angers, separation, the idea of “other”, fears. It’s our ego, our outer self that needs to validate a separte identity–I am conservative. I am progressive. I am white/black/Christian/Jewish, etc. He says in Eastern belief systems, the root of all suffering is said to be caused by focusing outwardly, on things outside ourselves that we want.

The trouble we have is that we are all placing blame. We all see “other”. We all see people at fault, that are not ourselves. Nothing will change unless we take responsibility. Until we take the time to look at ourselves and think about why we are here, what we hope to be in this life.

Gabriel’s words make perfect sense to me. If all of us, both “sides” could turn and look into ourselves, rather than finding “others” to place blame on, we will discover the truth within our hearts. I am going to maintain that belief that what is in the heart of ALL of us (yes, all, not most) is a desire for good. I need to believe that. Otherwise, this world makes me physically ill. And I need to stay healthy, to keep going, to keep working towards truth and goodness in this life.

I believe we are not here to serve ourselves. There is no “other”, no one to fear, no one to place blame on. He closed with some words of Pope Francis. I can’t remember them exactly, but the gist was “Flowers do not bloom for themselves; they bloom to bring color and nutrients to others. The sun does not shine for itself; it shines to bring light and warmth to the planet.” And so on. Nothing in nature exists for itself. We are nature. We do not exist for ourselves. We exist to bring color, warmth, light, goodness to others.

Going foward, that is all we can do. And I encourage my friends in other countries to remember that numbers matter. And although slim, the Majority of Americans voted against evil in power; the Majority are outraged by the events of last week; the Majority denounced apathy for the first time in many years and voted to take our country in a new direction. Have faith in the Majority. Have faith in the goodness deep down in all of us. Have faith that love will win.

I’m going to end today’s musings by saying that I beleive this is a good time for a wave of kindness to sweep the world. It is time for grand gestures. Everyday kindness, yes, but this is a time to think bigger, to show each other that love will win. Evil presented a grand gesture last week and is planning another one. We need to make kindness big, grand. What could your grand gesture be? I am ruminating on one. My husband presented an idea to me before I even came up with this grand gesture idea. The fact that we were both considering big, kind ideas independently is what inspired this. If we are considering big ideas, others likely are as well. I know I reconnected with an inspiring old friend who implemented her big idea late last year. It’s happening. I can tell it’s percolating. Let’s start the wave.

Love to all. Even those of you who tried to destroy my country last week. I’m still angry with you. You can do better. We can all do better. Do Better. Be Better.

Chocolate Nut Baked Oatmeal Recipe

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I have been a devotee of nutrition and healthy eating for several years. I believe what we put into our bodies greatly affects how we feel and conduct ourselves day to day. I believe it is our duty not only to ourselves in this life, but also to our loved ones, local community and the world as a whole to treat our bodies with respect and nourish ourselves in a healthy way.

The trouble is, it can feel extremely difficult. We are constantly enticed by foods that are way too high in sugar and empty calories. It can be tough to resist and put in the effort to eat well. I see my kids succumb to it daily. That is why I try to control what I can—to provide healthy options in our house, so that we all do better at least when we are home, which these days, is a lot.

I realise this all makes me sound high and mighty, which is not my intent. I must stress that I am not perfect or obsessive in any way. I love food and have never been one to restrict my intake. I also believe in moderation and that if we feel deprived, we are less likely to eat well.

So, no my kids don’t eat perfectly. Neither do I. We all eat potato chips. We all eat dessert. Ideally, I make our desserts, so I can feel better about them, but not always. And I do like my weekend drink or two each evening.

I developed this recipe when I was looking for something fun to make for New Year’s Day. We all enjoy a baked oatmeal and my kids go nuts for the word chocolate. But a recipe I found was loaded with unnecessary sugar. Especially to start the day with! So, this is what resulted. It was a hit all around!

Baked Chocolate Nut Oatmeal


2 c. oats

1 tsp. baking powder

1/2 tsp. salt

1 Tbsp. plant based protein powder

1 tsp. cinnamon

1 Tbsp. chia seeds

1 Tbsp. flaxseed meal

2 Tbsp. cacao powder

2 c. almond milk

1 egg

2 Tbsp. maple syrup

1/4 c. almond butter

1 tsp. vanilla

1/4 c. chopped pecans, toasted


Almond milk & raw honey to serve

Mix all dry ingredients and pour into 11×7 dish that has been sprayed well with cooking oil (I use a spray bottle filled with 1 part olive oil and 2 parts filtered water.).

Whisk wet ingredients and pour over the top.

Bake at 375F for 30 minutes.

Option: prepare the evening prior and refrigerate overnight; then just pop in the oven in the morning!

There you have it. Enjoy!

Another option is to enjoy from a bowl with a bit of almond milk poured over the top. 😋

Silver Linings

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Some of the local Colorado beauty we discovered this year

Well, we’ve closed out one year and moved into another. As 2020 wound down, I kept noticing statements telling 2020 to get out, of being thrilled to see the end of such a terrible year. It’s all really given me cause to ponder. How can a manmade, 365-day timeframe be awful and the next day, the beginning of the next manmade, 365-day timeframe be full of promise and joy?

I remember as 2020 began seeing many social media posts relating how awful 2019 was and how ready we were for 2020, a new beginning. I wonder how those of us who expressed those sentiments feel now? For our family, 2019 was a year of massive upheaval as we moved back across the hemispheres to begin resettling in America after eight years in Australia. I saw my post wishing for a calmer year ahead in 2020 with very little change. Interesting, eh?

In a way, I got exactly what I wished for. I did lose my job in March and worked a temporary job at a local food bank from April through December while I attempted to keep teaching yoga in whatever form I could. But other than that–we are in the same home we moved into at the end of 2019; the boys are in the same schools (well, Sam left his preschool and began kindergarten, although that didn’t feel like much of a change since he’s now at the school his brother attends and he was only in his Colorado preschool for a few months); my husband has the same job he began in 2019, and we mostly stay at home, partly due to the financial difficulties brought on by this pandemic coming on the heels of such an expensive move, and partly due to following the advice of health officials.

2020 has felt much calmer to me in many ways. Life is significantly slower for us than it was in 2019. Our family is now so close! The big move brought us tightly together for extended periods of time as we uprooted and began to resettle, and now this pandemic time has shown us that we all really enjoy each other. For me, not being very close to my siblings as an adult, it is a blessing to see my children’s bond, and I hope it lasts throughout their lifetimes.

I find a lot about 2020 to cherish–for us, it started with extremely sick kids. That had begun hitting by Thanksgiving of 2019. By March, they were all healthy after a difficult few months, and we enjoyed a perfect ski day with extended family. We were finally feeling settled, healthy and ready to enjoy life in Colorado. The next week, everything shut down.

The loss of my job has been unsettling and frustrating. However, the experience at the food bank was an unexpected blessing. I learned a lot about how many people live day to day. People that could very easily be my family. And I met wonderful people that I now get to call friends. I was also fortunate enough to pick up some work over the summer with the local Parks department, again meeting wonderfully kind people and learning some of what it takes to irrigate and maintain local parks–something I never expected for sought to learn.

A gorgeous sight during a day working with the parks department

Remote school has probably been the worst thing for us–for my husband as a teacher and my kids as students. As many people know, it is very difficult and that doesn’t change because the calendar did. My boys pointed out to me that covid life in America is their norm—that they’ve been in “weird” school longer than they were in “normal” school here. I worry about them socially. Academically, I trust they’ll be fine–for whatver reason that’s never been a big concern of mine, which I know is weird. But they didn’t have time to form solid friendships before things changed. And we don’t know neighborhood kids. So, we really have been on our own a lot. But like I mentioned, it’s been a true blessing to spend this time with them at these ages, and it’s helped us form an incredibly close family bond.

I get the opportunity to know them better and marvel at their positive attitudes and their resilience and flexibility. Kids are such wonderful teachers! They don’t mind a bit when a holiday tradition is changed. They go with the flow when travel hopes change or activities get cancelled–they find new ways to keep themselves occupied. We can all learn from how they have handled the changes brought by this pandemic.

Plus, we finally got our dog, our sweet Meadow girl. We’d been waiting for her for years, and 2020 brought her to us. She has really saved our boys, I feel. They all just adore her and I am glad they have had her as a new companion.

Loving our baby girl

So, I can’t really kick 2020 to the curb with zeal. There is much about it that I cherish. Plus, as 2021 begins, nothing magically changes. I still don’t have much of a job, and the food bank opportunity has ended. My family is still dealing with remote school, which I know will change as time goes by.

I know I would feel differently if we were part of the food bank lines, if we had dealt with serious illness or even loss like so many families during this pandemic. Again, the loss and illness and financial struggles will continue for many for awhile. But we have mainly been just inconvenienced. All that matters remains intact for us. And for that I am truly grateful. We look to the days, weeks and months ahead with hope and optimism. And we cherish the lessons we have learned, the experiences we have had and the memories we have made–from 2020 and throughout our lives. Cheers to loving and supporting each other and focusing on what truly matters!

Love what matters